Happy Birthday My Love!!!!

I woke up to a beautiful sunray shining through my room window this morning. I loved waking up this way….Although, I felt like I was forgetting something. What it was, I could not put a finger on it.

With no further delay, I got up, had breakfast left home for my morning exercise...Swimming!! Just the thought of being in the water felt calming.... I always feel free in the water. I'm a confident swimmer in the pool but not the sea. I use a life jacket for snorkeling trips...such a chicken!! Having said that, I have confidence I will counter my fear with the sea.

There's something about the sea that both excites yet scares me. Sometimes, I think she's a woman...hahahaha! Her mood swings are so hard to keep up! When she’s happy, crystal clear waters greet you. And when mad.... she’s scary! I have great respect for her.... No! I have immense respect for all of Mother Nature's creations. Secretly, I believe her creations have a mind of their own. They show their best to the people who love and respect their existence. Their best are usually little things, which is easily missed. And it's the little things that leave you feeling awe-struck! I'll show you what I mean...

Look at that sight! Isn't it amazing? I was waiting for my bus, when I took this picture. I didn’t even have to edit! The sun was too handsome to ignore. I just love how the day was enfolding so far....

I was hot as hell by the time I reached the swimming complex. I wasted no time striping down to my swim- suit and dived right into the water.  A good solid twenty minutes of non-stop swimming. I didn't want to over-do it after my crazy workout yesterday! Not that I'm an exercise freak, used to be one but not anymore. Come to think of it, I even had a personal trainer. Someone reminded me about him just yesterday. Hermano is a good soul. He thought me how to push myself. Hell, he believed in me more then I did...hahahaha! Nowadays, I exercise cause it keeps my mind, body and soul happy. That's all I need!

After my swim, I usually do a pit stop at two places. My favorite fruit-shop, followed by the Chee Chong Fun stall at the market.The fruit seller uncle is a friendly and talkative man. He likes to engage me in small talk & makes me laugh a lot. Bless his soul!  He discovered I understood Mandarin after my third visit to his stall. From then on, he only speaks Mandarin and forces me to teach him some Tamil. Hah! For all those who know me, they will agree it's a Bad Idea!!! Not that I can't speak Tamil. I can…very limited. I didn’t take the language in school, so I'm not entirely confident with the pronunciation.  And if pronounced wrongly , the word could mean otherwise. It's a beautiful language and I don't wish to kill it!

   

Chee Cheong Fun Aunty is unlike the Fruit seller uncle. She's very quite, took me five visits to get her to smile and start talking. Ammah(mum) loves the chee cheong fun from her stall, so I always buy it back for her.

Once that was done, I went to catch my bus home. While waiting for my bus, I came across an old Indian granny. She looked small, fragile but very fiesty. I could tell cause she stood right in front of me. She was waving to someone inside the bus. I peered closer and found out she was waving to her grandson. It brought a smile out in me and unknowingly some tears.

I didn't understand why but thank heavens for my shades. Judge me all you want, but I can be a softy at times. I did think about it for a while and it hit me....I missed Attah (granny). I tried not to think much of it and went on my way.  But the earlier scene kept playing in my mind… Why? So I distracted myself by reading SunGoddessTarot reading for the day. Jo's really good by the way! I find her tarot readings very inspiring. To a certain extent, I do believe in tarot readings and astrology, don't forget I'm a Moonchild. However, I don't allow it to take over my life.

Coming back, while reading, I saw the date...17th May. Hmmmm….Suddenly!!! It dawned on me. It was Attah's birthday….Damn! No wonder I felt like I forgot something. If Attah was alive , she would be 91 years old today. It was harder to let go of her than Tatta (grand-dad). Tatta passed on when I was 17. I was sad but I moved on rather quickly. For Attah, it was a lot tougher to move on, maybe because I was much older.

When I say move on, it didn't mean I forget them both. I only learnt to accept their absence in flesh. But kept their memories safe within me.  It's hard to describe what I'm saying. Maybe, those who had the privilege of growing up with their grandparents can relate. It's a beautiful bond that never leaves you. They are always there watching over you!

Attah was a small lady. But it didn't mean she was a pushover. She was daring, intelligent, loving and one heck of an amazing woman. She was a good cook too! She may have been a different person with her children. But her grandchildren were her prize possessions. No one...I mean no one was allowed to tease us! Only she had the right to do so :)

We've had trying moments with her. But trying moments are part and parcel of life. Keeping it for long is unhealthy. So deal with it and move on.  It's the little things she did that made her so lovable. She loved to watch us dress up. She used to sit on the sofa facing the staircase, waiting patiently…. Waiting to compliment on how we look. We loved to ask her do we look alright? In response, she would give us a big wide beam.. that means she approves.

When I stayed on my own, she would fuss over me saying I lost too much weight. She will call me during lunch times to have a chat, mainly to check on what I ate...hahahaha! She was adorable. My fondest memory of her was during birthdays. It will never be the same without her. The image of what she does stayed in my mind till now and I'll tell you why....

So Attah owned a small notebook. This notebook contained almost all family members contact details. Let’s say, it’s my uncle’s birthday and she’s going to call him. Here’s what she’ll do…from her bed, she'll slowly make her way to where the phone was kept. At that point, it was kept on our organ in the living room. She would make herself comfortable on the organ chair first. Position her book next to the phone and slowly punch in the numbers. She’s so cute when she does that! She waits for the call to go through and once the person on the other end says "Hello"....she silences them with a birthday song. It’s a birthday song that is out of this world…she starts on a low keynote and ends off with a power pack high note. Just listening to her sing…God! That feeling was indescribable. What I would not give to hear that again!

I was not present for many family functions, which I’m not proud about. My circumstances and priorities at that point were such. I was glad though that I turned up for her final birthday. I took many pictures and videos, which I still keep. This photo that I took of her was at her final birthday. I made her pose and smile for it. It was a funny moment, she was feeling so shy to smile. …Can you believe that! It was one of the best pictures I ever took of her.

Happy Birthday my Sweetheart! I'm so glad you were my Attah, Subbu! No words can describe how much I love and miss you!

Oh my god! Look at the time...can you believe it's close to dinnertime. Time flies so quickly when you are having so much fun. I've got to go now…before I do. Let me leave you with something to think about..

Don't be too busy just making money. It only pays the bills, doesn’t buy you happiness(to me at least)!  There's also your friends and family too. Make time for them. Cherish them with all your heart. Remember the good times and not the bad. Don't forget to give daily doses of big hugs and sloppy kisses too. Trust me...they will remember you for it!

Lastly, don't wait for tomorrow to say how you really feel. Do it now, as tomorrow may never come!

I wish everyone a great workweek ahead. Have fun…cause I know I will!!!

Cheersxxxx